How to prepare your first child for a new sibling
Congratulations on your growing family! While a new baby brings great excitement, it comes with many challenges, and it’s natural to be worried about how your firstborn will react. Depending on the age, whether ages 1-2 years or school-aged, the reactions and ways to prepare will vary. From breaking the news to your child to prepping them, we put together ways to help your eldest transition from only child to the role of being a big sister or brother.
Sharing the big news
There is no right or wrong way of sharing your special news; however, the more time your child has to get used to the idea of a new baby, the better. Most experts agree once you begin to show, it is best to tell your child. To avoid making your child anxious about the upcoming changes, you should give them enough time to ask all the questions and have extra alone time with each parent. Use age-appropriate language and visuals, such as books or pictures, to help them understand about becoming a big brother or sister. It's also important to address any concerns or questions your child may have and to reassure them that they will still be loved and valued.
Ask for their input and involve them
Involving your child in preparation for a new sibling is the perfect way to get them excited about the arrival and help them feel a sense of responsibility. One way to involve them is to ask for their input on decorating the nursery or choosing toys and items for the baby. Also, you can give them small tasks to help with the arrival, such as organizing the baby's room or even being involved in the naming process. Additionally, you can read books about becoming a big brother or sister, such as Mummy, What’s in Your Tummy by Bernardita Romero, and You Were the First by Patricia MacLachlan, to encourage conversations about what it will be like to have a new family member. Show them ultrasound photos, and let them feel the baby kick; the more involved, the more excited they will be stepping into the role of big brother or sister. It's key to give them a sense of importance and to make sure they feel included in the process.
Set aside special time
Setting aside quality time with your child when preparing for a new sibling is crucial to maintaining their sense of importance and security. One way to do this is to schedule regular one-on-one time with your child, such as a special outing or activity. This time should be focused on your child and their interests and be free from interruptions. Additionally, you can set aside time each day to spend with your child, such as reading a book before bed or having a special breakfast together on the weekends. It's also a good idea to create special memories with your child before the new baby arrives, such as taking a trip or having a special date night. This way, your child will have positive memories and feel like they have a special bond with you.
Expect regression
Anticipating regression with your first child when preparing for a new sibling is very common. Regression can manifest in different ways, such as a child starting to wet the bed again, having difficulty sleeping, or even returning to an old habit like thumb sucking. It is crucial to understand that these behaviors are not signs of disobedience or poor behavior but instead a way for children to cope with the changes that are occuring in their life. To help with this, be patient and understanding with your child and provide them with extra reassurance and support. Establishing a strict routine and structure for your child will help them feel more secure. Additionally, you can encourage your child to express their feelings and thoughts about the new baby and help them understand that it is okay to have mixed emotions about the change.
Prepare for your hospital stay
Leaving to go to the hospital may be confusing for your child. Be sure your child feels secure and taken care of during your absence. Having a trusted family member or friend care for your child who keeps them informed and involved in the process is best, so they can turn to them when they have questions or need emotional support. You can also put together a special care package for your child that they can have while you are in the hospital, including items such as their favorite blanket, a stuffed animal, or a book. It is also beneficial having a conversation with your child about what will happen when you go to the hospital and explain that you will be home soon. You can also make a plan for how you will communicate with your child while you are in the hospital, such as video calls or sending pictures.
First visitor
Allowing your first child to be the first visitor when preparing for a new sibling can be a great way to involve them in the process and make them feel special. Meeting their new sibling for the first time can be a positive and exciting experience for your child. Before your child visits or meets their sibling, talk to them about what they can expect and how to behave around the new baby. Create a plan for how your child will interact with the new baby, as they may be curious and want to touch or hold the baby, which can be dangerous if not supervised. You can also prepare your first child to be a helper, teaching them to bring you a diaper or a pacifier so they can be involved. Explain to your child that the new baby will require a lot of your attention and care, and that they should not feel neglected or replaced. Reassure them that they will always be important to you and that the new baby is an addition to the family, not a replacement. You can also prepare a special gift or card for the new baby from your first child.
We hope our tips and tools will help you through this new and exciting time. Preparing your first child for a new sibling can be a challenging but rewarding journey. While it is essential to involve your child in the preparation, communication with your child is crucial. Every child is unique and may have different ways of coping with the changes, however with love, understanding, and patience, it will be a positive experience for your family, and you will navigate through it and grow stronger together.
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